By Kate Freeborn
I crunch along the northern Minnesota shoreline, make my body an animal in the wild. Big, knowing. Beneath me, White Iron Lake a frozen body of water. New snow pulls lake and shore into a contiguous landscape of winter. The afternoon sun illuminates it like a disco ball. Rock ledges erupt in white sunbursts and diamonds, the light rolling me forward. I lean into the wind and trek toward the empty center of the lake. Whipping snow zigzags across the whited plane and I race the snow snakes, my lungs exploding white plumes into the bright, egg-blue sky. Stopping, I drag my metal snowshoes in a full circle to face north. 2,500 miles of winter stretch to the apogee of the planet, the Arctic Circle.
I feel, for a moment, absolutely myself. The center of my own circle.
I don’t know it, but later I will be transported to that concentric ground again and again, perched on a rounded edge of wintry Earth. When I nurse my newborn in the folds of night, when I spoon honey into my child’s mouth to still her cough, when I park in the rooftop lot of a downtown ramp, when I rush to the office as the snow twists over the icy pavement. Then the woman on the lake will return to me, her snowshoes and eyelash crystals. Her heaving lungs. Alone in the wild winter and facing it down like an animal, she carries me with her into the blinding light.
Kate Freeborn received her MFA from the University of Minnesota. She lives with her husband, two daughters, and golden retriever in St. Paul, Minnesota. She is the recipient of a Minnesota State Arts Board Grant, the Loft Mentorship Series Fellowship, and the Gesell Award for Excellence in Creative Nonfiction.
Image by Adam Chang courtesy of Unsplash
You’ve captured the images and feelings beautifully. It’s so true that some moments bolster us through our lives.
This is so evocative! To carry that image of oneself at a moment of completeness into your everyday life – so grounding. Beautifully written. Thank you!
What a gorgeous piece. I felt transported, not only to that crystalized winter landscape, but to the space where each of us feels most truly ourselves. I will come back to this. Thank you.
A moment that captures your strongest self. I love this piece.
Wow. Just Wow. Gorgeous imagery, beautiful fierceness.
I lived across the road from a frozen lake for many years. This took me back to those same moments, that freezing authenticity. Thank you. Beautiful.
Dag. This is so good. Thank you!
Beautiful writing Kate.
Yes. Finding our true selves where we can revisit. Beautiful Kate!