By Jill Currie
After the excavation of greasy burger wrappers and weepy paper cups. After my crusted dishes are repatriated, left to soak until some other, more convenient time. After the layered heaps of lost gym shorts and a decade of too-small soccer uniforms are hugged into black garbage bags. After the last day, when my nineteen-year-old son and his friends-turned-housemates pitch the remaining odds and ends into boxes, picking the bones of his childhood clean.
After all that, he comes back for the curtains. The blackout curtains that helped him sleep in on so many school days—past the alarms I begged him to set, past all my fruitless shouting, past noon.
I say he might as well take the rod, too, and he looks surprised, as if it never occurred to him to wonder what was holding them up. Looking past them now, through the window, he asks, “Did you know …” and I brace myself for a story about one of the times he snuck out, but instead he tells me that senior year his friends used to park down the street on test days, creep through the gate into my back yard to tap on this window above his bed. If he didn’t wake up, they would reach a hand through to ruffle his hair.
He tells me this as he casually reaches up, drill in one hand, removing each screw with merciless efficiency, a friend at each end to catch the rod as it falls.
Jill Currie (she/they) is a poet-turned-nonfiction writer whose work has appeared in Calyx, Literary Mama, Poetry Northwest, and other journals. She lives in the Pacific Northwest, where she is working on a memoir about neurodivergence and intergenerational trauma. Her son lives nearby and is doing just fine on his own, thank you.
Image by cottonbro studio courtesy of Pexels
*This essay originally appeared in the Beautiful Things series on January 20, 2025
WOW. Just WOW!
The hair ruffling caught me with my mouth open. The image was both sleepy and energetic, but it is the thought behind the action that waters my eyes and carries me through to the end.
Every word matters. And you make it look effortless.
Wow Jillian. This reminds me that I need to get back to reading better non fiction and fiction. Thanks for sharing.
Wonderful. I know that young man. I know him because, you have so eloquently captured for me his youthful essence— he’s never before had to consider how things get done.
This is so lovely! The curtain rod metaphor does so much heavy lifting here to take us through the pain and hope of this moment.